SUPPORTING SCRIPTURE
1 Kings 19:4 The prayer life of a Christian can sometimes become tiresome, especially if you don’t feel like praying. We hope our simple prayers centered around everyday life will provide some guidance and help you grow in your prayer life.
cw: suicidal thoughts, depression
Sometimes I Don’t Want to Be Alive
Darkness. Confusion. Hopelessness. Exhaustion. Loneliness. Addiction. Shame. Fear. Mental illness. Abuse. Trauma. Bullying. Emotional numbness. Depression.
If you or someone you know has struggled with suicidal ideation, it’s possible that one or many of these factors have been present. Life is really hard, and people experience the difficulty of life differently. And if you’re someone who’s struggled or is struggling, we want you to know we’re so sorry for the weight you’re carrying. We wish we could fix it for you. And we know, these feel like cheap words. We wish we could give them more weight.
But a few quick thoughts (hopefully they’re helpful). First, DO NOT be ashamed of seeking help from a therapist or counselor. It’s for reasons like this that God gifted them in the way that he has. Please reach out! And if you don’t know where to start, call or text 988 (suicide hotline). Secondly, God is NOT ashamed of you or embarrassed by intrusive thoughts. He created you and loves you, period. Finally, your death would have a deeper impact than you might think. The world would be at a loss without you.
It might be helpful for you to see this verse, too. It’s a verse about a pastoral figure in the Bible named Elijah, who was at a complete loss for what to do next. He was afraid. He was lonely. And, well, read what comes next…
“He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. ‘I have had enough, LORD,’ he said. ‘Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.’” (1 Kings 19:4).
A Prayer for Suicidal Ideation
Jesus, you know what it’s like to feel completely abandoned and overwhelmed to the point of sweating blood. Meet me in this earth-shattering struggle. Light of the World, even the darkness is as light to you. Please shine your light of hope and peace into these suffocating shadows. Embrace me with your love. Protect me with your strength. And guide me to those who can help. Amen.
Note: We’re not experts on suicidal thoughts. If this is a struggle you have, or if life just feels a bit out of control, consider seeking the help of a therapist or medical professional, or calling the Suicide Prevention Line at 988.
At some point, everyone feels that they don’t know how to pray, feel free to visit this page for more everyday prayers to explore how you can connect with God in the ordinary, extraordinary, everyday moments of life!
